Say What YOU Mean...

One thing that I have struggled with my whole life, is to say what I mean instead of letting my emotions take over. I have always felt things very deeply, and sometimes I have a hard time putting into words what I am feeling. I am introspective, and I need time to understand what I feel before I can explain it to anyone else.

When I was younger, I hadn't learned how to process my feelings and I just carried my pain around with me. I would get angry and immediately lash out. I felt like the whole world was against me and I was fighting my way through life. I would set myself up for an argument before the conversation even started. I wasn't listening to the other person talk because I was too busy defending myself. 

I then went though a stage where I shut down completely. I would hold everything inside and not talk about my feelings at all. Then everything would build up and I would explode like a two-year-old child having a temper tantrum. With a lot of hard work and determination for self-growth, I have finally found a balance that makes me feel like a new woman.

I have learned to not let myself react or assume anything until I have reflected on how I feel. I write my feelings down as I feel them. I don't hold back, I just let it pour out (irrational or not) for only me to see.  Sometimes that's all it takes, and I realize that whatever was hurting me has resolved itself. Other times I will go back and read what I wrote and think, "What where you thinking dumb-ass LOL!!!" It's amazing how distorted our thoughts can be when we are feeling hurt. Writing down my feelings allows me to calm down and to see things from another point of view. I look at it calmly instead of reacting with my emotions. My thoughts become clear, and what I want to say becomes clear.

 

Say what you mean and speak with kindness. Be vulnerable, and honest, and clear about your feelings.  
For Example: (I FEEL alone when you go to the store) vs (I HATE when you go to the store). Don't attack the other person, just tell them how you feel. It's okay if they don't get it. You spoke your truth and said what you needed to say. XO